Brazilian Bird Phrasebook







Brazilian Bird Phrasebook - fantastic story русский


Scientists from the Brazilian University of Sao Paulo have achieved significant results on the basis of recognition of bird speech. A group of 30 specialists from the Faculty of Philosophy, Linguistics and Other Humanities - Faculdade de Filosofia, Letras e Ciencias Humanas (FFLCH) went into the tropical jungle for a deep immersion in bird language. They left everything that could distract them from constant communication with feathered representatives of the local fauna. They left computers, tablets, telephones, tape recorders, books, magazines, documents and all-all-all that could resemble human speech. People lived on the same trees on which the birds lived, people drank the same water that the birds drank, people ate the same food that the birds ate. The specialists did not speak each other in human language, only in bird language. Permanently in only one bird language. The punishment was the expulsion of the offender from the community. Cruel, but fair. In two years of the experiment, twenty women, two men and one dog were expelled.

The results were astounding. All the remaining specialists chirped incessantly in various bird dialects, two employees of the Department of Applied Linguistics made a nest in the bushes near the Ipiranga River and tried to lay their eggs. Ipiranga - literally translated from the language of the Indians Tupi means "red river". On the banks of this river on September 7, 1822, Brazil's independence was symbolically proclaimed. One young graduate student migrated, apparently, with a flock of migratory birds to Tierra del Fuego. Cardon was left before his return. In general, the experiment was a success. "Futi-fi, futi-fiu," as Professor Rio Joppi-Doo noted to reporters of the Brazilian television channel Sao Paulo Canal de Sao Paulo. The only collateral effect was that scientists for two years of complete immersion in the language environment of birds completely forgot the human language.

Some employees accidentally uttered obscure words in the Brazilian language, but they did not make any sense, basically it was a crude parody of the questions of the medical staff conducting the examination. No words were spoken in English or Spanish. At the same time, they were well understood by the birds, constantly circling in the vicinity and periodically sitting on their shoulders or on the heads of Brazilian linguists. Professor Rio Joppi-Dou pointed his finger at a large white pheasant and shouted into the camera "fujt fju tiu-tju-tit". "Tell me, professor, how soon will the Brazilian-bird phrasebook be released?", the television reporters asked. The professor consulted a little with a large white pheasant, after which the pheasant replied: After seven months, I think if everything goes smoothly. As you said? This is my dad.


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